Author is not an alien

Author is not an alien
I write because we had deleted enough

Saturday, March 24, 2012

We Breathe CRICKET

Sachin nearing his 100th ton at the Asia cup match against Bangladesh and the whole country went crazy,social networking sites were bombarded with tweets,status updates,pics and what not.Suddenly the whole country was divided into two categories -


1)Sachin is God types-For every second Indian ,Sachin is god of cricket ,join this community and you would find many loyal friends always there to protect you in any war of words.They have some easily identified symptoms-change their DP to that of Sachin whenever he hits a century ,become hell of creative when admiring sachin ,MINDD ITTT if you even utter a word for Sachin's retirement (okk if you are wondering,i belong to the same category)


2) Sachin Should retire types- so they are the ones who keep on advising that Sachin should retire time n again and yes they are not Sachin haters(that's blasphemy in India) but every time Sachin replies them in negative and they are hell of war of words with the former category ,logic pe logic but no one cares.Their community is small (and some of them are hard core "Dada"fans too) ,but let me warn you they are very adamant


Rahul Dravid retires and we fill up the pages with tributes n videos and yes Mr wall of Indian Cricket ,you rightly deserved it for you personified the Gentleman's game in a true sense 
,there are no categories for Dravid never lets anyone give him advice ,you may not be a Dravid Fan but you would always adore this Superb player and a great human being 
"my approach to cricket was relatively simple ,it was about about holding the dignity and upholding the spirit of game.I hope i have done that,i leave with sadness and pride"
We would miss you too 




So we are a country that BLEEDS BLUE ,we eat cricket,we breathe cricket and with IPL around the corner we have more n more reasons to celebrate .Delhi is a diverse city when it comes to traditions.food ,fun ,so how come cricket would lag behind and as a hard core delhite who loves Delhi ,i am supporting Delhi Daredevils........ready for the challenge?

Sunday, March 18, 2012

HOLY SHIT & AWESOME SHIT

No neither i have gone insane ,nor my blog account has been hacked-its my new post
It just happened one fine day that i was travelling by metro and as a matter of habit i was observing the guys n girls around (to look for the new fashion trends of Delhites of course ) and then i heard a very interesting piece of conversation and here it goes :
Girl 1(with colored hairs and a huge tattoo of goddess Durga over her arm) :Hey dude,this is my friend Neha
Girl 2 (Neha of course,with all possible piercings that just demarcates her from a tribal woman) :Hey hi Rahul,she has been discussing 'bout you a lot........ of course nothing personal  *giggle*
Boy : Hi Neha!so what are you doing these days?
Neha -Mass Com.
Boy-From DU?
Neha- No way,not even in my dreams,they are so padhaku types and I am doing it from the most fundoo college J***
Boy -Thats Journalism na?
(Poor boy his meager chances of being a super cool faded at that very instant)
Neha- Puhleeezzzzzzz!!!!!!(with an expression that dental surgeons make on examining a patient with bad mouth odor ),
journalism is so HOLY SHIT &mass com. is so AWESOME SHIT


Welcome to the Generation X who have a Facebook terminology,SMS vocabulary which ranges from LOL,ROFL, STFU, Puhleez ...........You can easily find the girls saying"I toh love this bag,its so damn sexy"""""if you are a parent of a teenager who has lost his sleep pondering over your son?daughter's language ,let me decode a few for you:
NICE/GOOD/UNCLE-AUNTY TYPES mean boring
SEXY is nice for them,COOL is what everyone wants to be these days,these days you are not in a relationship ,you are HOOKED ,remember they are cursing you when they say F*** YOU ,KICK IN THE ***,SCREW YOU
Need to stress upon a fact:add a DAMN ,even better if you prefix a SO ,Some hindi terms are also considered cool as if Smoking is so ancient,SUTTA LAGANA is what counts
You don't drink you actually GET HIGH or BOOZE OFF


Writing this post i remember my bespectacled high school English teacher who used to deduct my precious 0.5 or 1 marks even if i wrote "&" in place of "and"and once my principle made me spell "Sewing" a 100 times for a perfect pronunciation 
In this hyper connected world where many 'Tweet before they act',updates their facebook status even before they pick up a brush in morning ,this radical change was doomed to come


Life is like a Maggi Noodles thee days -instant and quick &to match that language had to change a little In this generation rabbit won't loose the race as he won't be sleeping,rather tweeting and even tortoise wont be behind ,he would be following rabbit's updates 
Well no hard feelings for anyone ,i toh enjoy listening this super cool language and with every passing generation there occurs a change in language ,who knows they would find themselves a place in dictionary too
No moral policing on the language that we speak.........if saying "awesome shit" makes you happy,say it with a bang............Love ................Sehar