Sakshaat was
dormant for some time and I was constantly asked who is next. Call it lack of
inspiration or the life’s turnarounds; I was not interviewing any new faces for
Sakshaat. Here I am back with a girl I am in absolute love with. A national
chess player, A wanderer, travel writer and a proud Indian, she does make quite
a lot of people uncomfortable just by speaking her mind& this is what makes
her one among the many voices that are drafting a song for the new woman.
How did I
met Anu? One fine day while I was working for a development project in Bihar, I
was given a role to conceptualize and lead a state policy. As it happens, the
men who were asked to work for me (much senior than me) didn’t cooperate and
things were not falling in place. When one day I overheard two people talking
that they are not going to let a “Ladki” supervise them, I lost cool. I banged
into a very senior director’s office and just blurted out. Though I am not very
proud of the words that I used, this obvious sexism was too much to handle.
Well, I came back to my desk, logged into facebook and the first thing that I
read was Anuradha’s post about when she resigned from her job. I sent the same
to my friend and he asked “You are resigning from the project?”
So the
stalking of Anuradha started on facebook and I found everything about her beautiful. Her “No Bra campaign”, her
writings, her unapologetic attitude, her travelling, her Haryanvi and her family.
We absolutely recommend reading her debut book “ Azaadimera brand” which is the
first part of “YayavariAwargi” by RajkamalPrakashan, a travelogue of modern
times, read this book for the sheer honesty and simplicity of this girl on her
endless journey.
Here is the
sixth interview of Sakshaat with a buddy who lives her life exactly like the
way she travels- No plans, No regrets and overcoming fears, the secret
ingredient is happiness always.
Q) Thank You
Anu for “FINALLY” agreeing to be here?
A) Yes I am!
Your love couldn’t be ignored any longer. You know, I tried! ;)
Q) Tell us about Anu the girl in her growing up
years, was she a rebellious teenager, did she believed in fairy tales or was
she like just another girl?
A) I was never
a rebellious teenager. I was a docile, meek, and obedient girl. I didn’t
believe in fairy tales. I was never told any. I believed in hard work. I was
told, only if I worked hard I will be able to make a life outside the daily
“panibharna” and ‘gobarpaathna” in the gaon. I was told if I didn’t work hard I
would have to pull water here all my life! And that was enough motivation.
I started
playing chess as a child and was India number 2 in my age group. In Haryana I
only played in boys, as there were no women player and I won all my age groups
starting from under 7 to under 18. I use to practice 8 to 12 hours a day and
became sub-junior national champion in 2000. I represented India in World Youth
Championship in 2001, in Spain. That was my first trip abroad. And that was my
first taste of freedom.
I was never
rebellious. I wanted to be, I guess. But I was not. I was harassed in the
streets like any ordinary girl, and I walked with my head down, I kept quiet. I
only wanted a (silencer) gun at that time! But I never forgot. College (Miranda
House) gave me a lot of strength and I revisited those streets with more
confidence. I wandered in those streets again with my head held high, looking
back into each eye that stared at me, till they looked away.
Q ) You were
homeschooled, at any point of it did you have doubts about lagging behind the
children who were attending school regularly?
A) I was
playing chess all the time. My competition was not with regular school going
children. I competed in chess tournaments and did well. I had very little
interaction outside the chess world.
Q) Chess for
you is……
A) Hard work,
still! But I enjoy teaching it, more than I ever enjoyed playing it. I love
teaching little kids chess.
Q) When we
read Azaadi Mera Brand, we find that you were travelling just for the love of it
and not for writing a travelogue. How did you convince yourself to give a shape
to this book?
A) I was
writing a lot of facebook posts while traveling if you remember. Rajkamal’s commissioning editor
Satyananad Nirupam came across my posts and made an offer I couldn’t refuse! It
was a good excuse to document my travels.
Q) An old adage says “Behind every successful
man is a woman” , I want to ask you “Behind every happy woman, is…………..?”
A) Her girl
friends!
Q) Your
heartwarming appeal to stop the violence in name of Jat agitation resonated
with many and also received backlash from many harvanvis.Your say on people
saying that at one side you criticize our culture and then you preach?
A) I love
Haryana! I am very attached to my people, my gaon, my mother tounge (Haryanvi),
our songs, our food, our fields, our sitting together and laughing out loud,
our dances and our dry humor! And that is our culture.
By my
writing I try to smash the “nonsense” that is being imposed on us in the name
of “culture.” Female feticide is not our culture, dowry deaths are not our
culture, purdah is not our culture (if it is, it needs to be thrown out of our
culture), letting girls not study or have an independent life is not our
culture.
It’s time we
define what our “culture” is, and root out the evils that are shaming our
state. The shamefully skewed sex ratio shames our state and not girls wearing
jeans. The number of domestic violence and rape cases shames the state and not
women marrying out of love. We have to get this right in our heads now!
Q) Coming back to travelling, Given a choice of
solo travelling and one with your best of girl buddies, what will you choose?
A) 11 months
solo, 1 month with girl friends!
Q) How do
you respond when someone says that India is unsafe for women( I have often
faced this question from foreign tourists on my travels)?
A) I traveled a
lot of India solo. There was no bad incidence but one has to be always “careful”
and that takes a lot of fun away from traveling. And still Jaislamer remains my
favorite city in the world! Also because now I know how to handle “things.” I
have dealt with my samaj so much that I know what to do when, it won’t be as easy for a foreigner.
Q ) This
question is a little personal, I have admired your father. In a world where I
find most of the men driven by fear and insecurities, I find your Papa one of
the most courageous and yet unaware of it man. Tell us more about him?
Anuradha's family receiving Shantikumari Vajpayee award |
A) He is quite
something! He loves me too much and when there is so much love, there can only
be freedom. He never attached his “naak” to me. He always said, “You’re my
love, not my izzat,” you do what you like and I will always be there when you
will need me. “Tumhare kaam se tumhare izzat hai, mere kaam se meri” Your doings
can never affect mine and vise-a-versa!
Such
unconditional love makes one very strong.
Q) Answer
the following words in one liners:
A) 1) Awargi–with
awareness
2) Friends –
girls
3) Love–you
4) Marriage
– should be taken less seriously
5) Sex – Right now
6) Age - 29
7) Wish list
– travel till I am 90 (if I ever am!)
8) Dreams – always
come true
9) Fantasy –
Johnny Depp
10) Hindi –
Aaaah mother-tounge. Forgives like a mother. Easy like a mother. Soothes like a
mother.
Q ) Thank
You so much Anuradha for answering our questions. Anything you would like to say
for Sakshaat?
A)Thank you
for giving me this space and making me write about myself. It’s good practice
for an autobiography!
Q)
Congratulations for the award on your debut book and the efforts you are taking
for the rehabilitation of people suffered from damage. Lest we say we all are
proud of you.
A) Thank you
dost
P.S.- Anuradha is raising money to help the victims of intercaste violence in Haryana. You can contribute for the same at: